- Robber Angst
- A man in Pennsylvania robbed a bank with an unloaded gun in order to get away from his controlling wife.
- He was courteous to the bank tellers, made no threats and even loitered long after he was handed the money, asking the tellers if the police had been called. Police said after a ten minute conversation with the man’s wife they wanted to be put in jail too.
- The robber’s wife had threatened to kill herself if he left her so he felt this was his only way to get away from her. Lucky for him, while he was in jail his wife filed for divorce so all’s well that ends well, sort of.
- Sleepy burglar
- Only in Florida, this Goldilocks of the crime world fell asleep on the job while he was burgling a house.
- After a long day of illegal activities, this hardcore thug just wanted a little shut eye. When the owner of the house found the sleeping thief, they promptly and quietly called the cops and tip toed around the tuckered out crim. The burglar explained that he’d overindulged in the family’s stock of chicken wings and beer before desperately needing a lie down.
- At least he was confronted by cops instead of a family of bears, though I’m sure he’ll see his fair share of bears in prison.
- Maniac Manure Masturbator
- David Truscott is really into cow dung, so much so he started frequenting a farm in the UK and would take the manure home with him to fulfil his sexual fantasies.
- When hauling the poop home wasn’t enough to satisfy him anymore, he began rolling around in the muck, covering himself in it while he masturbated.
- At first the farm owners weren’t too worried, until he started pleasuring himself. When they put up fences to prevent their pesky pervert from returning, he threatened to kill them and tried to set fire to the farm. When he was sent to jail David maintained that the charges were bull shit.
- Twisted Twins
- Jennifer and June Gibbons are twins way creepier than anything from ‘The Shining’. These twisted twins cut themselves off from society at a young age, speaking their own secret language and performing tasks in unison.
- The family tried to separate the girls by sending them to different boarding schools but they went into catatonic states until they were reunited. Then in their late teens their short lived crime spree began and their relationship became even more volatile resulting in numerous attempts to kill one another. They committed petty thefts, vandalism and moved their way up to arson.
- After being caught burning down a barn, the pair were sent to a psychiatric hospital. At the age of 29, they decided that for one of them to live, the other had to die. Shortly after, Jennifer died from an inflammation of the heart, the cause of which remains a mystery.
- Making Mummies
- When dozens of graves had been disturbed and bodies stolen in Eastern Russia, the police sought the help of Anatoly Moskvin, an academic and local expert on cemeteries.
- They quickly discovered that their expert was actually the perpetrator! In his apartment police found the bodies of 26 of young girls that he had mummified. As if this weren’t disturbing enough, he painted their faces to look like dolls and would interact with them, throwing them birthday parties and celebrating holidays.
- He told police he was trying to make the girls comfortable while trying to find a way to bring the young girls back to life using science or black magic. Yikes! Thankfully he was put into a psychiatric facility where he could get the help that he needed.
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