From Marvel C-list heroes to Sylvester Stallone’s worst side kick, we look at 15 characters who are annoyingly useless.
15 – Storm in X-Men,
- 2000’s X-Men was one of the first attempts to do a Marvel comic series as a serious film adaptation and much like the comic it becomes the Wolverine show pretty quickly, even more so over the sequels.
- Because of this a lot of other awesome mutants get pushed to the sideline, Cyclops is mostly just a jerk, Jean Grey is bland love interest and Storm is just there for the ride.
- Given no character development and only getting to fight Toad in the first film, Storm spends the film standing in the background and occasionally offering up some terribly written dialogue.
- While not annoyingly useless Storm is more an underused badass that deserved better.
14 – Zam Wesell in Star Wars Episode II: Attack of the Clones,
- The Star Wars prequels are filled with useless characters and Zam is one who doesn’t get mentioned enough.
- Zam is the bounty hunter hired by Jango Fett to kill off Senator Amidala so that it stops something something space politics.
- Why Zam is so useless though is that she decides that the best way to kill the former queen is poison space millipedes. More than that when she gets caught by the Jedi she wastes every opportunity to kill them from afar, sneaking right up to them like an idiot.
- Zam is played up to be a kick ass bounty hunter assassin and in the small time we get her on screen she screws up every task the story has for her.
- Jango should really pick his sub-contractors better.
13 – Hudson in Aliens,
- One of ‘Aliens’ best remembered parts is its awesome Vietnam soldier inspired colonial marines.
- Touted as the badest mofo’s in space, Hudson spends the whole first half of the film mouthing off about it in every line he has.
- But when the Xenomorph threat attacks though the true Hudson comes out, a coward who talks big but is about as useful as the cat from the first Alien film. Having a breakdown and spending the rest of the film talking about how they are going to die, making his famous “Game over man” rant. It says something when even your action figure is permanently terrified
- Though while Hudson is a useless soldier he is great comic relief and in that way does redeem himself for the audience because he is hilarious for every second he is on screen.
12 – Black Widow & Hawkeye in The Avengers,
- These two are both an issue mainly because of the characters that surround them in The Avengers.
- Black Widow and Hawkeye are incredibly skilled, talented and can hold their own in a fight…but from a story point of view they don’t really do all that much.
- This is mainly because the main villain needs to be more powerful than Iron Man, The Hulk, Captain America and a mythical Norse God in order to be threatening. In comparison Hawkeye shoots arrows and Black Widow shoots bullets while doing martial arts. Neither would stand a chance against a strong villain on their own and really how is a good archer going to help the HULK.
- We see this in The Avengers as well when Hawkeye shoots a bunch of arrows at Loki and none of them do anything because arrows don’t beat superpowers.
- Hopefully they will get to be more useful in future Avenger adventures.
11 – Elektra in Daredevil,
- Yes we are picking on the Marvel heroine again.
- Looking only at ‘Daredevil’, Elektra is totally inept and exhausting as a character. Her highlights include beating up a blind man, totally blaming the wrong person for her father’s death, beating up a blind man again, trying to catch a blade with her hand and then being stabbed by Colin Farrell. All of which make things worse for our hero.
- There is not one thing she does right except for being ace at murdering sandbags.
- We promise this is the last time we’ll bring that up…….for now