15 Annoyingly Useless Movie Characters

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10 – Ruby Rhod in The Fifth Element,

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  • Chris Tucker has a reputation for being just a little tiny bit annoying and this was the role that really earned him that reputation.
  • Ruby comes out of nowhere in the film, suddenly thrust upon us as an over the top media personality and a clear opposite to our hero Corbin Dallas. The two but heads and comedy ensues. Or at least it should
  • As a comic side character Ruby is hit and miss and the misses are mainly to do with the fact that he makes everything worse.
  • Constantly repeating “Corbin, Corbin, Corbin” a million times over and screaming when ANYTHING happens. Ruby freezes up and basically has to be carried in Bruce Willis’ muscular action arms through the plot making their relationship painfully useless.

9 – Sam Witwicky in Transformers,

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  • Never has such a bad series of films made so much money. Looking at the problems Michael Bay’s eye-gasm of robots of explosions is impressive, seeing Shia Labouf looking confused and slack jawed for 3 hours is however not.
  • Sam really shouldn’t even exist in these films. We have giant transforming robots and we spend 80% of the story dealing with whether or not Sam will get laid. Because that’s what we all payed to see in our fighting giant robot movie.
  • Shia Labouf plays the character with all the charisma of a damp cloth and never carries across any indication that he or his actions are important to the overall war.
  • In the fight against the decepticons, Sam is as useful as a transformer that turns into a toaster.

8 – Cindy in Commando,

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  • Schwarzenegger’s power house of 80’s action has a lot of good points, Cindy is not one of them.
  • A character like many others in the dark time of female action sidekicks that is relegated to screaming a lot and awkwardly trying to help but making things worse. She screams, she kicks and she wines her way through the film, being upstaged by child aged Alyssa Milano
  • This exemplified perfectly when she tries to bust Schwarzenegger out of a police van with a rocket launcher. Getting confused she aims the mighty weapon backwards and manages to blow up the city block behind her.
  • Though she does work out to turn it around and fire at the van this time.

7 – Willie Scott in Indiana Jones and the Temple of Doom,

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  • Like Cindy, Willie suffers the same fate of being a mouth on legs that will make you want to open the ark and have your face melted off than have to listen to her for one more minute.
  • Someone thought it was funny idea to team up one of the world’s bravest adventurers with a jewellery obsessed, insect fearing singer.
  • How Indy put up with it the whole film is a miracle, playing up the fish out water aspect of her character, the singer has many moments of shock at the foreign culture that she is confronted with. Constantly complaining about how disgusting everything is around her, like her elephant smelling, the insects in the jungle and fainting when she’s served chilled monkey brain for dessert…..okay maybe that last one is a little disgusting.

6 – Bella in the Twilight Saga,

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  • Twilight plays the dual role of being both one of the most incredibly popular film series and also one of the most loathed and derided in recent memory. One such reason it gets so much criticism is the output of its protagonist.
  • Bella doesn’t take an active part in anything, she is whisked away into this world of sparkling vampires and shirtless werewolves, consistently being encompassed by the characters actions around her and not really taking any actions but to be upset about sparkle guy and shirtless guy doing something.
  • Bella almost is the monster movie equivalent of Sam Witwicky, both are bland teenagers caught up in a secret battle between fantastical forces. While Sam is focused on getting into Megan Fox’s pants, Bella is love obsessed.
  • We spend so much of her story dealing with her romantic interests that the fighting vampires and werewolves just happen to be in the background much like with Transformers and the robot battles.

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