15 Most Useless Video Game Characters

AshleyGraham

7 – Waluigi – Anything He’s In,

Waluigi_MP

  • Waluigi was created in order to give Wario a partner in Mario Tennis and reasons beyond my understanding he’s stuck around ever since.
  • But I guess being a tall skinny version of Wario is enough that even he has a fan following on the internet, but really anyone that likes him has about as much personality as a paper plate.
  • It’s not like Mario has a shortage of enemies in the game, but I guess they really wanted Wario to have a partner, just like every other character in the Mario universe.

6 – Villagers – Minecraft,

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  • When I first heard that Mojang was implementing a trading system in Minecraft I was pretty excited, it sounded like the perfect way to turn all those items you have no use for into something other than chest fillers.
  • But instead they require emeralds, an item that should drop from enemies, but instead is rarely found underground or by trading with the villagers themselves.
  • Ultimately the only real contribution their addition made was the generated villages that they live in, which admittedly are nice places to start your first base, but that’s about it.

5 – Mission Vao – KotoR,

Missionfulltaris

  • Mission is a sneaky 14 year old Twi’lek girl that uses pistols, oh and she also has a Wookie best friend.
  • And she’s about as useful as you’d imagine a 14 year old with a pistol might be, but at least she can pick locks, which might be of some use if you couldn’t just break them open with your lightsabre.
  • I guess the game had to have a smuggler/Han Solo type character but she really doesn’t fill that role very well at all.

4 – Princess Peach – Super Mario Brothers,

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  • Newer games and spinoffs notwithstanding, Peach’s only use is being the arbitrary reason that Mario goes on his adventures throughout Mushroom Kingdom.
  • Not only that but she gets kidnapped so often that I’m surprised Mario has any reaction other than ‘oh boy here we go again.’
  • But at the very least she serves as a playable character in the spinoffs and the New Super Mario Bros. Series, however, that doesn’t detract all the years of servitude she put Mario through.

3 – Slippy – Star Fox 64,

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  • Slippy has an ear grating mouth that flaps about constantly, worst of all his character has just about no redeeming qualities other than, ‘hey look it’s a talking frog!’
  • If that weren’t enough, Slippy also flies into your line of fire way too many times to be an accident by the developers, who it seems wants him to die as much as the player does.
  • In addition to the above, he also requires you to save him thirty-thousand times a mission, so do yourself a favour and don’t bother with him, he should go back to flight school and possibly have his voice box removed.

2 – Magikarp – Pokémon,

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  • Magikarp was put into the game because it follows some eastern legend about a lowly carp turning into a dragon and to Magikarp’s credit its evolution is pretty cool.
  • However, that doesn’t mean that the levelling process isn’t a long and arduous affair that requires constantly swapping out or relying on a sometimes rare consumable item.
  • The worst offense of all is when you find the rare shiny version of it, which is a very rare occurance than is utterly wasted on Magikarp since you’re guaranteed to find a shiny Gyarados in the silver and gold versions.

1 – Samus – Metroid: Other M

samus-thanks-adam

  • Other M is an all-round bad game that lacks anything that makes the other Metroids good and no small part of that is due to just how annoyingly useless Samus is.
  • Unlike in the other games, Samus in Other M has serious daddy issues and won’t do anything that her once Commanding Officer authorises her to do, even if that involves burning to death in a volcano.
  • Even if you ignore the horrible story, she controls awfully thanks to moving around using a D-Pad even though she’s in a 3D environment, even though there’s a perfectly good nun-chuck attachment, she also needs to stand perfectly still when firing missiles, which pretty much ruins their usefulness for anything other than opening doors.

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