15 Ridiculous Banned Kids’ Toys

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From a plastic animal that offends an entire subset of the population to toys that represent homosexual propaganda, we count fifteen toys that have been banned by conservatives!

15 – All Simpsons Toys,

  • In 2012, Iran banned all Simpsons toys to prevent the spread of dangerous Western values. The cartoon was found to exhibit ‘self-centred and irreligious attitudes’.
  • Barbie was also banned, leading to raids and arrests on toy shops and creating an actual underground toy importing movement.
  • Apparently, Superman and Spider-Man toys are okay because they ‘help oppressed people and have a positive stance’.
  • I don’t know about banning Simpsons toys, but I could sure get behind banning new Simpsons

14 – Plastic Pig Banned from Farm Animal Set,

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  • Toy shops in the UK have removed the plastic pigs from their children’s farm toy sets because they fear they will upset Jewish and Muslim parents.
  • A mother complained of the missing pig to toy store Early Learning Centre and received the explanation that it was removed for ‘religious reasons’. Muslim and Jewish religions ban the eating of pork because they consider the pig an unclean animal, but it’s a toy farm set and nowhere does it advocate the consumption of pork.
  • A spokesman for the company said they removed the pig in response to customer feedback and didn’t wish to create offence in international markets. How about you’re offending my right to re-enact the film Babe.

13 – Carmageddon,

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  • The UK is generally strict about video game censorship, but one 1997 game managed to slip by, despite being inappropriate for children.
  • Carmageddon was a driving game where players were rewarded for mowing down as many innocent bystanders as they could, turning them into minced meat. You may think so what? I do that in GTAV all the time, while smoking cigarettes and skipping school. Well, you’ve got to remember that not everyone has shitty parents, and that, in the Nineties, video games were still very much considered a children’s pastime.
  • When concerned parents learned of the game’s violence, the game was recalled and the designers changed the humans into zombies and their blood green. Ten months later, the game was back on shelves.

12 – Black Canary Barbie,

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  • A conservative Christian group made headlines when it tried to have the DC-affiliated Black Canary Barbie banned from sale.
  • With her fetching leather jacket-underwear combo and fishnet stockings, Black Canary is arguably one of the least revealing female superheroes out there. However, Mattel’s version of Black Canary was more provocative, with the media dubbing her ‘S&M Barbie’. Religious group Christian Voice claimed the doll wore ‘sexually suggestive clothing’ and that it was ‘irresponsible filth’.
  • This is not the first time Barbie has faced bans. Others included the culturally insensitive Mexican Barbie and the Totally Tattoo Barbie, which many feared would encourage kids to get inked.

11 – Toy Gun Ban and Megatron,

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  • In early 2015, the Tennessee House of Representatives passed a bill to ban water pistols from within 150 feet of a school or park.
  • It was determined they were a safety risk, but the funny thing is that real guns – the kind that actually kill people – are still perfectly legal. It’s like the old adage says: guns don’t kill people, but toys might.
  • Nowadays, all toy guns have to be brightly coloured. This is because a company made the gun version of Transformers villain Megatron look so realistic that people used it to take hostages. A ban was enforced and reissues were required to add an orange cap to the end of the barrel.
  • In Australia, the toy is still illegal to own without a license and a lockable gun cabinet.

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