8 Horrifying Sex Deaths

From faulty chastity belts to S&M that went horribly wrong, we look at 8 horrifying sex related deaths.

  1. Felix Faure

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  • Trust a French president to die during sex; Felix Faure was having his Eiffel tower serviced by his much younger mistress.
  • Back in 1899, Felix Faure was at the end of his first term as president. His official cause of death was listed as a stroke, which is true. But word got out that he’d died while his mistress was going down on him.
  • When the servants burst in, Felix’s hands were still stuck in his lover’s hair. She was apparently suffering from shock-induced lockjaw with the president’s solemn member still in her mouth. Poor guy was probably gasping for air and she thought he was about to blow his load. That rigor mortis can be really misleading though so who can blame her?
  1. Homemade Chastity Belt

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  • Poor Rosa Vela didn’t exactly die during sex. No, her death was technically caused by a lack of sex.
  • The 22-year-old Peruvian woman died from an infection caused by a rusty lock on her homemade chastity belt. Her jealous husband made the medieval device to ensure she stayed true while he was away on business trips.
  • Unfortunately, one trip required him to stay longer than originally anticipated and the infection turned toxic. Remember kids; It doesn’t pay to be handy in the home. Always go to Home Depot for your chastity belt needs.
  1. Marriage of Genitals

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  • So it turns out sexual repression is pretty widespread throughout the world, regardless of nationality.
  • And poor Sachi and Tomio Hadaka were no exception to this. The Japanese couple were so painfully shy they waited fourteen years into their marriage before they decided to do the deed. Japanese couple had simultaneous heart attacks during sex. On the plus side, their autopsies revealed they’d also experienced simultaneous orgasms so good for them.
  • This is the case of the unluckiest long-term virgins ever. Maybe if this was a horror movie you’d understand why they got bumped off after bumping uglies, but come on, this stuff shouldn’t be happening in the real world.
  1. Jimmy The Squished

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  • Jimmy Ferrozzo, also known as Jimmy the beard, died from an unfortunate workplace accident.
  • He was the assistant manager at a topless bar called the Condor and after closing one night, Jimmy was getting frisky with an exotic dancer. The lovers were fooling around atop the club’s piano that was wired to the roof. Dancers were regularly lowered onto the stage on it. Unfortunately, one of the lovers knocked the lever to raise the piano and Jimmy was crushed to death between the roof, his lover and the piano. If his lover had been riding cowgirl she would’ve been the one crushed but alas, it was missionary that was Jimmy’s downfall.
  • His lover was actually pretty lucky that Jimmy’s body prevented her from being crushed to death too but she was stuck beneath his body until 7am when the janitor came in. That would’ve been an awkward convo.

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